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Find your keys, Buy food, Stay Married

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I step away from the keyboard for two minutes to get coffee and whoa, two years go by.   Sorry, I had hoped to be a little more consistent with ADD Dude.   Can’t remember if I ever got the coffee.   That’s what happens when I set my supports aside, run out of meds, and abandon the structure I created to keep things on track.   Learned my lesson right?  Just knuckle down, “get ‘r done”. Even today, I’ve already flitted around the house, displacing the blog to snack, shave, feed the cat, and wash the lawn chairs. I don’t even own any lawn chairs. And when did we get a cat?    IMPORTANT ISSUE AHEAD My wife told me the other day that she would like to take my ADD and kick it down the stairs sometimes.  She wants to put on heavy boots and stomp it until it begs for mercy. And I can see why.  She has to wait, time and again while I dawdle, procrastinate, and forget things.  These episodes intrude on our day.  That’s right, it’s her day too. Signs of the Problem ·        
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Don't bug Me

You don't always have to wake up energized, uplifted and cheerful. There are days when you might feel more than a little messed up. Like today for instance. We add-ers have our little moods. "Don't you know why" asks my beloved Vicki. "No! " I growl back at her. See, even a professional like me can be a turd sometimes. What were you just looking at last night? Duh. Weren't you looking at the records of your Mom's history during WWII? The certificate showing her among the survivors from Bergen-Belsen concentration camp... Her name on the roster from the Lodz ghetto in Poland. "I'm not listening, la la la la. That's not it. Won't let a little thing like the holocaust bother me. Must. Push. Feelings. Away. Or maybe I'm just burned out. I can't help people anymore. I've been therapist since 1982, and that's enough. I just want to watch car chases and gun fights on T.V. I want to go bowling, eat french fries and dr
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How To Stay Interested

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Are we having fun yet? We ADD-ers get bored easily. Duh. We like novelty, and change. In fact, I feel bad for the ketchup when it's one place too long. When you are in college, the classes, books, and papers just keep coming. You just have to do it, even when you don't want to. Even when you want to do something else. We can get whiny and pitiful. If only there was a way to make work fun... AHA! You remember that you are a creative, out of the box thinker, prone to solving problems, and that you thrive on challenge. You can reach into your vastly superior brain and come up with many ways to beat back the monotony, the routine, the boredom. Oh, the pain. College to too important to to let feelings of boredom get in the way of success. Try a few boredom busters: Rubber Chicken Challenge - Find the fun no matter the task. My wife, who is relentlessly uplifting, came up with this one. It can be done. Wear a goofy hat. Talk like a duck, impersonate a character. Austin Pow
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Two of Our Least Favorite Words Two of our least favorite words have to be “pay attention”. First of all, someone is likely speaking to you, which means your mind went for a little hike. Or someone was telling you something for the 3 rd or 4th time, and he or she wants it to stick. Sometimes, my wife Vicki says, “this is the last time I’m going to tell you…” That phrase definitely gets my attention. It used to bug me. But I now see that she expects good listening. When I say something, I expect good listening too. Don't you? I want to take a stand for being a good listener. When I check out from a conversation it can appear leaky and irresponsible . Stephen Covey (see Seven Habits of Highly Effective People) emphasizes the importance of seeking understanding before being understood. To do that, we need to focus. Otherwise, we are making withdrawals from an emotional bank account. That is not good for a relationship, or one’s integrity. Occasionally we al
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No Waiting

Need I tell you that we ADD folks are not the best time managers on the planet? Indeed, speaking for myself, I always seem to be the last one out the door. My wallet mysteriously moves itself, and my keys wander away all by themselves. I never turned in a school assignment early. Ever. Know that people in your life are waiting for you to finish things. Your wife or girlfriend is waiting for you to pick up the mail, go to the store, take books back to the library, or massage her feet. There are perfectly valid reasons you have putting off your next dental exam. Again. In order to make amends for those times where our friends, family or coworkers have waited for you, I propose that you declare a "No Waiting Day". And the sooner the better. It works like this: MUR: "Vicki, I'm declaring a "no waiting day". Anything you want me to do comes first. Anything you need you need me to do goes to the top of my list. And I will do it right away." VIC: &quo
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